I hate everyone. Especially those assholes who came up with that “I believe in a thing called love” song because I don’t believe in a thing called love. Plus, the song reminds me of retarded kids trying to yodel.
Anyways, in the words of a t-shirt that I once read, “I don’t want to talk about my feelings, I just want to get drunk and fuck.”
But instead of liquor, I’ll have a dr. pepper, and sex will be replaced with playing tetris.
Time to go crush cans on my forehead.